| “Just remember, the same as a spectacular Vogue magazine, remember that no matter how close you follow the jumps: Continued on page whatever. No matter how careful you are, there's going to be the sense you missed something, the collapsed feeling under your skin that you didn't experience it all. There's that fallen heart feeling that you rushed right through the moments where you should've been paying attention. Well, get used to that feeling. That's how your whole life will feel some day. This is all practice. None of this matters. We're just warming up.” So 2010 is finally here, and maybe it was just me, but 2009 really flew by fast. Another year over with, and although in 2009’s “New Years Blog” I said things were going to change I didn’t quite expect the outcome. Things definitely changed. I started out the year homeless, and jobless. I have a job now (that I love), and I have the money to get an apartment I just haven’t found one that I like yet. :) 2008 hadn’t been the best year for me, but I decided that 2009 was going to be amazing. In reality 2009 was more than amazing. Even though there were some events that happened in 2009 that were pretty upsetting, like the two funerals I attended. Fortunately the two funerals were the only thing in 2009 that weren’t good. Everything else was falling into place. I met many new friends this year and lost one, but through that lose I’ve learned a lot. Like where most of the drama in my life came from. Thankfully my life is pretty stress free now. I don’t have a friend that’s into the ‘he said, she said’ drama anymore and I’m very grateful for that. I met some amazing people though like Emily, Carol, Sean, Kai, Zach, Kayla, Dalynna, and Kylie. The first three I met at Bonnaroo :D Bonnaroo was an amazing experience. My first music festival ever, but definitely not my last. I'm already making plans to attend again this year (and I don't even know the lineup yet..ha) along with preparing for other musical festivals that may catch my eye. Lollapalooza would have been perfect last year if I'd had the finances. I'm not sure how well my job is going to take it when I ask for 5 days off in a row, but I'm not that concerned. I won't let a mediocre job stop me from living my life to the fullest, and although I do love the job (mainly because I run the store at night and I don't have to deal with coworkers drama) I will happily switch jobs in order to fulfill some goals and wants of mine. Maybe that sounds selfish, but I spent most of my childhood being the grown up so I just want to have some fun now. Of course my idea of fun, and others ideas of fun have always been different. New Years Day was my 21st birthday and I didn't get drunk! I don't think that drunk people are that interesting, they turn into babbling idiots if you want my honest opinion. Why would I want to be one? My assistant manager couldn't believe it when I told her I didn't drink on my 21st birthday. Instead I had some grape juice and pizza and played the latest Halo game with my two best friends. (Heh I really suck at that game btw...) We had fun. Maybe it's not what everyone was expecting me to do, but hey...I never really do what people are expecting anyway. My generation is all about going to parties, and catching the next high or whatever and that's just not who I am. I love going out and having a good time, but I love staying inside and reading books too. I can play lazer tag and pretend to be the best player in the world, and to me that's fun. Just don't trust me playing mini golf...heh. Learning to play the piano, or driving down the road with my music turned up, or hanging out with my best friends...that's all fun to me. So what if I don't go out and get plastered, I don't get stoned, or I don't get slutty...that's just not who I am. I'm perfectly fine with that. I went on a couple great dates in 2009 and one really bad one. I ended up dating one guy, and I broke up with him because he liked me a whole lot more than I liked him and I didn't think that was fair to him. He is a great guy and I know that he is going to find someone that will make him amazingly happy and they'll both love each other...that person just isn't me. It may seem harsh, again I'm just trying to be honest. So what about 2010? Well I have a few plans in mind. I plan to: Buy a car, Get an apartment, Save money, Be prepared for Roo by June 1st!, Volunteer more, Continue exercising, Check into the Criminal Justice careers and decide if I'd rather do that or become a doctor. For now that's all I have, but I'm sure more will come to mind soon enough. It's Day 4 of 2010, but I already feel like I've accomplished so much. My life has definitely taken a turn for the better. I can't wait to see what the rest of the year has in store for me. I'll keep you posted =P |
I'm converting this xanga page to a place where you can find anything you need. If I don't have it, ask for it. Music, icons, anything...
